Things are changing, I don’t know who I am anymore. I can’t breath, I can’t eat, I can’t exercise, I can’t think, and mostly, I can’t sleep. My wings beneath me have been snipped away as an endurance athlete. I am terrified and living in a state of panic and depression. What is causing all of this? I visited my local naturopath and she ordered a hormone panel for me. There results came back showing that I have very low cortisol and DHEA, which are the hormones that regulate stress and keep the adrenal glands functioning, therefore, my circadian rhythm is off and that effects everything. I’m also starting to drop in estrogen which tells me I’m starting peri menopause.
I’d say I started noticing a decline in my sleep, energy, and response to stress this past spring. I was feeling sluggish on my bike and I was responding to my kids and husband as if everything were a crisis. I was having trouble falling asleep and staying asleep, even with prescription meds. I was starting to feel out of control. Well, now I am rock bottom.
When I was first diagnosed, the hardest part for me to face was cutting way back on my exercise. Mountain biking is my favorite sport and it was the end of June, just the beginning of the high alpine rides melting out. My first reaction, was to ask my Dr for a supplement to give me more energy. She gave me some high potency adrenal support with a bit of natural cortisol. This back fired on me as it shook my nervous system into a constant state of panic. My stress was escalating and I was questioning if I was terminally ill an/or developing a severe mental illness. I went back to her and she put me on something completely opposite, theanine, a natural Xanax. This has really worked in settling down my nervous system and I have actually gained a bit more energy because I’m not exuding all my energy on panicking. However, I’m still not sleeping. I’ve had about 4 or 5 decent nights in the last six weeks. and yes, I’m still worried and it’s hard to see a light at the end of the tunnel.
If you’ve read my other posts, you’d see that it’s no surprise that I’ve created this mess upon myself. My struggles with anxiety, sleep, marriage, and obsession with exercise were the perfect cocktail to put me into this state. Now the trick is how do I reverse this? I know I need to make some major lifestyle changes(mostly with the way I think and react), but easier said then done. I’ve been prescribed to practice yoga, some meditation, and find better ways to deal with my stressors. So far, my first step is acknowledging the fact that I need to let things go and accept the things I cannot change. My Dr asked me if I was religious or had a God. My answer was that nature is my God. I’m allowed to go on walks when I feel up to it. Slowing things down, taking deep breaths, being patient, and enjoying the views are all what I am trying to do. So this is where I am in my journey with adrenal fatigue. Please follow me as I will continue to update my struggles and hopefully, triumphs….